Email epilepsy

Sundays for a normal person would be filled with all kinds of fun things – taking a walk, shopping, church, family time – gah, I sound like a Hallmark card, don’t I? Well, Sundays at Casa de Behler consist of going through submissions that have piled up over the weeks.

One thing that can really trip up correspondence is email. I’ve had three authors whose emails shot me one hell of an annoying “You are not on ABC’s approved email list. Send us a vial of your blood, your firstborn, and this filled-out sheet so Mr. ABC may add you to his approved list.”

Um. I know it’s Sunday and all, but SCREW Mr. ABC and his list. While I’m mightily tempted to offer up my firstborn, I will not jump through hoops just to send an email saying, “Hey, dood, I’d like to see some pages.” He’ll never know that I want pages. Furthermore, did Mr. ABC think any editor would stop what she’s doing to fill out such nonsense? Who lost here?

The other problem I’ve had is the guy who writes back after my repeated attempts to contact him to tell me that, Oh! I changed my email address and don’t use that old one anymore. Gee, heh, heh, lucky I checked this old address, huh? Headbang on desk.

Kids, may I inject something here? I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that you’d actually like to hear back from those you queried. To that end, doesn’t it make sense to have a dedicated email account ONLY   for queries? Get a hotmail, yahoo, gmail account IN YOUR NAME. I don’t need email addys like or

That way you can switch over from Express to Outlook, maintain your cutsie-pie email addy, or request a major limb in order to make it past your ISP’s spam filters. None of it will affect your writing future.

As for the four authors I’m unable to contact…they will eventually want to know if I ever read their works. They can find me at

9 Responses to Email epilepsy

  1. Suzie F. says:

    Does that mean that your other email address,, doesn’t accept cutsie-pie addys too? I’ll have to remember that.

    p.s. I love your blog. You never fail to make me laugh!

  2. I second what Suzie F. says. My first thought upon reading this was, “No wonder the beagle drinks so much!”

  3. Not again, Pricey. I am so sick of wiping up snorted coffee from my keyboard.

  4. Suzie, the beagle accepts anything that contains promises of unlimited tequila.

  5. Lauren says:


    Lynn, are sending any of these my way? Cause I am getting them too . . .

    It does make one wonder what they want if not an answer.

  6. Lauren, dear, I have an automatic forwarding system in place that has your email addy all over it. We still friends?

  7. I would suggest not using hotmail; it’s pretty much a petri dish for script kiddies, and hot mail addresses, like aol address, are on the large subscription based block /black hole sorts of lists used by ISPs to preventively block spam at the server level.

    I’d also suggest not using an account name that is cute, based on a fandom, or contains numbers, punctuation marks, asterisks or anything that is not somehow related to a name of a business, the writer or the writer’s pen name.

  8. Lauren says:

    Yes, we are still friends.

    : )

  9. Simba says:

    that’s funny… is a real site! i typed it in on a whim

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